Your cage? Honestly, it’s giving “I tried to cobble together a chastity device from the bargain bin at B&Q’s plumbing section.” That first pic doesn’t scream “caged” so much as “someone flattened a sad scone and called it a masterpiece.” I’m half-convinced you cracked open a Tenga egg expecting a cheeky Kinder Surprise and got this pathetic lump of metal instead.Let’s talk design—yours looks like the overflow plug from a dodgy Wetherspoons loo, desperately trying to hold back a tide of pure disappointment. The flowery vent pattern? It’s like you’re trying to tart up your bits to look like a Primark tea cosy, but it’s not fooling a soul. Those three dials on top? Probably a combo lock to save us all from the horror show down below, but I reckon it’s knackered because even the cage is mortified by what it’s stuck with.That scrotum separator? Utterly pointless. It’s like you’re trying to convince us there’s something worth sorting out down there, but I’m giving it the side-eye, wondering if you’ve smuggled a punctured Space Hopper instead. Those two sad conkers you call balls are locked in a pathetic scrap, tangled up like they’re auditioning for the world’s most tragic episode of Gladiators. I’d chuck a tea light under that cage just to see how quick you’d squeal before those pitiful nuts roasted into charcoal.The piss tube? An absolute pisstake. It’s like you’re trying to catch the last dregs of your dignity as they dribble out in your kip, probably cos you’re passed out from the sheer embarrassment of this setup. You’re strutting about like your caged junk’s the star of the show, but it’s more like the warm-up act for a circus even the dodgiest car boot sale wouldn’t touch.Rating? A generous 2—1 point for the size of that ridiculous piss tube, and another cos you had a go, even if it’s a masterclass in being utterly pants.

I still cant believe how incredibly tiny it is🤣 almost amusing how small and helpless it looks inside that cage. It barely deserves to be called anything more than minutes pathetic shrimp, completely impractical little thing. Being locked away is the only fitting place for it, really. It’s more like a decoration than anything functional, so small it barely registers. Definitely one of the most insignificant I’ve ever come across iv seen more meat on chicken nuggets then your dick.

I’ve never been more disgusted in my life🤢 I had to put on my glasses to see if there was anything there😂😂 I’ve seen clits bigger than that pathetic excuse of a cock😂😂 no wonder he keeps it in a cage, no one wants to see that😂😂😂😂😂

Lost for words, impressive device but he’s practically non existent😂 Think it’s for the best it’s kept locked away in there where it belongs! I need a tip after seeing that😧

Oh wow what can I say, it’s just about the smallest little pathetic nub I’ve ever seen, locked up in that tiny cage which is lucky because it doesn’t have a lot of other uses being so small. Furthermore, it MUST stay locked up, this is a tiny little useless clit-sized dick. It’s pathetically small and useless for anything other than being caged in the chastity belt with the tube. It has to be the smallest I have ever seen, without question, it made me laugh.

Respectful and He paid but
Wow small….. tiny …..non existent!!!! Boy iv seen some small ones in my time but your 1cm grain of skin by far has topped them all.Useless. To say the least and the fact iv even had to witness such horror compensation was needed.

Wow, where to begin?! Simultaneously the most impressive and most dreadful thing I’ve ever witnessed! The contraption itself is very sophisticated and does the job nicely. The same cannot be said sad little cock inside it😂 top marks for effort though 👏🏼

The rating is purely for the device and pee tube! Such an impressive contraption, 5 * just for the shock factor and the pain I’m sure it causes! Pathetic dick I’m sure but wow I’m impressed 😍

Incredibly small dick in a chastity cage. It has a pee tube too. Honestly impressive. I have never seen something like it, he deserves some credit. 5 stars for the shocking factor and the small dick. It’s painful to watch.

Had to take my glasses off, rub my eyes and put them back on to make sure I wasn't seeing things.

It was the not being able to see it that did it for me! My clit puts it too shame.

Good job hes polite and patient but that deserves to be locked up forever!