Penis Portrait

🙄Mental health disaster, chameleonic gobshite😏
👑Top 0.1% seller😉
🚫I block what annoys/ain't for me😘
🤨Don't leave me on fuckin' read😒

❤️Tips & gifts always appreciated and rewarded;
🎁 https://throne.com/calamitykaila
🎁 https://www.amazon.co.uk/hz/wishlist/ls/2WP9WEO418VFT?ref_=wl_share

If you don't see what you want listed, it's worth asking me anyway. I don't list everything and I have a lot of stuff 😉

Stats 📃
Age: 38
Height: 5'6
Dress size: UK 14 (12-14 undies)
Boooooobs: 34D
Shoe: 7 UK

I blur out my tattoos when I remember, but do show face in most stuff.
Also, I have a tiny dog, so be aware of that if ordering physical items.

👌Prices are what they are, and reasonable offers are considered.
📷Custom photos - £5 for two, depending on the nature of the photos.
🎥Videos are bare minimum £15 for up to a minute. After that, it can be discussed, content dependent.
🛞Wheel spins and tasks prices are for all spun in succession and given to you in bulk. If you want them one by one, you need to pay me for my continued time on top.

All instant content can be bought with other payment methods and given to you via Google Drive access, DM or Wetransfer.

💸 I accept;
💷 Amazon GC
💷 Revolut link
💷 Throne
💷 Amazon WL (item needs to arrive before payment is considered completed)
💷 KC if no other payment available.
Other payment methods may be considered, depending.

⛔LONG TERM SISSY SPOT FULL⛔

Piss me off? Gulag. Waste time? Gulag. Leave me on read more than once for no good reason? You got it... Gulag.
💅Gulag happens when you're a little bitch.

Don't expect immediacy, because I don't expect it from you. We all have lives and obligations. ❤️

😘 I also don't NEED your custom. I'm here because I want to be, and I get to be selective.

I don't;
❌Do JOI (I'm too giggly), sc@, bugs, race play, age play, extreme pain, adbl, cuck, breeder or under 18
❌Do full nudity (yes I show pretty much everything but I don't do full body nudes)
❌Pander to buyers at ALL - I won't chase you and I don't want you to satisfy me
❌Give out my real name or my address, give socials easily, or my number at all
❌Forbid subs to roam - it's their choice. RESPECT it if they want to stay with one owner
❌Want unsolicited nudes, videos or to see you jerk off - ask for consent before anything x-rated
❌Give a shit if you are premium
❌Betray confidence or disclose info about buyers or sellers to anyone
❌Do refunds - and I can't control what delivery companies do

I do;
✅Have a sense of humour
✅Have a fucking temper
✅Have physical and instant listings in my shop
✅Drains - only provided the buyer gets something from milestones we set - be it session time, pics, etc.
✅Respond to reasonable, polite messages
✅Shitpost a little too much
✅Lose my filter a bit, and say what I mean
✅Swear a lot
✅Have a partner
✅Like kink exploration & fun
✅Have standards, and a heart and sense of compassion up to a point
✅Get to pick and choose who I do what with, end of story.

🐶 Ownership ethos -
The point of having pets is to be served, yeah, but it's also to enrich their lives and help them to overcome their weaknesses. They are NOT toys, they are to be CARED for. Don't talk to them like they're shit.
🙇 @jessthesissy is my sub, she doesn't really like to share unless it's collaborative or sending fairy tips, so don't pressure.
🙇 @emamanuu is my pet, and he's a good doggy. If you play with him, treat him accordingly.



DM me if you have questions, I'm not a complete bitch. Just mostly. 😏