Strong, stunning, and always out of your league. 💪👑

Morning! I’ve decided to grace the day with my presence. You’re welcome.

Playing Cult of the Lamb and not gonna lie, laughing my ass off 🤣 Some of you better recognize yourselves—I swear this game has your vibe!

Saw this bloodless castration device and all I can think is, ‘Why isn’t this more widely used?’ Some people are practically asking for it!

Wise words

Safe note is E-flat

In my boots, ready to ride the wave of your broken dreams. Yee to the haw 🤣

Salem’s verdict:

Leaving this here

Me when men breathe

Not really

I snack on subs like you. Who’s ready to be my next meal?

Do you wanna build a snowman?

If you’re not ready to beg like him, you’re not even in my league.

Note to the chef: Wash thoroughly before adding to the pan

You know what time it is! Perfectly polished toes, because every inch of me demands the finest attention. Only those who know how to worship properly can appreciate this view. Send tributes!

In loooove with my new Loro pianas!!! Maybe I should get them in pink too 🎀

Fell off my horse today… Graceful as ever. One minute I’m ruling the world, the next, I’m face-first in the dirt. Don’t worry though—my horse is fine and thoroughly unimpressed.

This snoot? Instant love. You? Gonna need a lot more effort to get this close. 🐴💋