By Fem_Mil_PT 1928 views
Thank you for coming to my blog. Firstly, I'd like to say that kinks are not a subject I am professionally qualified in, however, studying human behaviours and psychology has.
Since joining ATW I have tried (and still trying) to vary all my content to please every kink, but something I've always wondered is - why we have them and what makes us like different things?
It's a fact that the majority of people (around 75%) have at least 1 kink. Unlike us, a lot of cultures or places with bad sex education look down upon the subject, meaning people probably would never experience or ever open up about their kink at all because of their social environment or other factors!
Fear is almost drilled into young people. The fear of getting pregnant or contracting different infections. What about how great it feels?
When people think of the word 'Kink' most think of leather, whips, and 50 shades of grey. The actual psychology behind kinks has never been fully understood and accepted.
A lot of the time it is almost related to past trauma and labelled 'not normal' (which is fake news).
Let's normalise kinks, spread education and teach it is a normal aspect of someone's sexuality!
As we grow up and begin to become more sexually active, we understand our sexuality more. Physical touch and objects we experience sexually within these arousals become connected. And boom, a fetish is born.
But did you have these hidden in you as a child? Did you play cops and robbers?
Now ask yourself, did you get the thrill from being chased and captured or were you the cop who loved to arrest the robber and feel powerful?
Crazy huh?!
It's known by many psychologists that children as young as 10 can develop kinks. However, adults can also develop them later in life with experience.
As the kink world continues to grow, people are learning more about it. Consent and Non-Consensual (CNC) is becoming a bigger, talked about subject, and rightly so.
This is allowing people to explore their boundaries and give up power to another person, an idea that seems scary for some.
Going back to cops and robbers… If you fantasise about being arrested or kidnapped, certain sexual partners are willing to 'role play' Non Consensual role play. In order to fulfil both fantasies, CNC allows both parties to negotiate, for example, a 'safe word'. The scene that they both create then seems real and they can push certain boundaries until the safe word is spoken, or not 😈.
Have you done this before?
A psychologist in America (Samuel Hughes), has an interesting article where he explored the development of kinks in people and come up with 5 stages. Can you relate to them?
Whether you're dominant, submissive, switch or just curious, exploring sex is part of growing as a person and identifying who you are.
It allows inclusion for every gender; the use of safe words allows he/she/they to feel protected and respected enough to open up and explore their true desires.
If I was back in my early 20s again and was told the kinks I would enjoy a few years on, I wouldn't believe it.
I've grown so much as a person exploring things. Yes, not all are what I enjoyed but I wanted to explore my curiosity.
Mentally, I feel it's great for your health. Being stuck in a box surrounded by non-acceptance is not the way in my opinion.
At first, things feel 'weird' or a bit 'cringe' but that's part of knocking down that barrier, that old voice telling you it's wrong.
Explore with an open mind and watch yourself grow and enjoy things you never thought you would! It's your story, make some cheeky chapters.
Fem.
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